i must be overly sensitive today or something…
so my mom always gets on my case about me not focusing on studying and school and what not but she’s hardly home so she doesn’t even know what i spend my time doing. today she comes home and my grandmother decides to rat me out by saying that i hadn’t eaten all day. blah, i woke up at 11 with absolutely no appetite and all the stress i’ve had lately is beginning to get to me so having a lot on my plate tends to curve my appetite. keep in mind i never said i wasn’t going to eat today, all i said was… I DON’T WANT TO EAT IF I’M NOT HUNGRY. anyway, mom comes home and continues to rant about why i just went into the kitchen got my food and went into my room without talking much. listen, i had stuff to do like homework and clearly you’re not gonna help me get it done so cut the 21 questions b/c you asking questions doesn’t get me anywhere. needless to say i didn’t say all that but i did say that i had homework to do. it just irritates me that she complains about me when i seem to not be doing work and when i am doing work she complains about how anti-social i become.
BLAH, grad school is no joke and i really wish i could be done so i could move out of my house. despite how comfortable it is to live at home sometimes i just want to be alone and not have someone constantly on my back. i feel like i’m always walking on eggshells. not only that but the added stress of having my grandmother living with us is also driving me up a wall. yeah she’s my grandmother but i grew up w/o her in my life so i could care less if she’s here or not. granted she does keep me company but to me, i’d rather be alone at home. i feel like i only spend time with her b/c i have to and not b/c i want to. i have too much going on than to keep entertaining her… le sigh. i sound very selfish but if i have to do what i need to do to get where i want to be. i can’t keep getting sidetracked by the people around me it becomes an inconvenience and that’s something i really don’t want at the moment.
